Top Chef Masters Season 2 – Spoiler alert – you’ve been warned. 

Top Chef Masters Season 2 final episode-Of course each Chef had their own great stories…but the word “Master” should evoke years of respect and accomplishments…clearly not the case in this season’s final judgement. 

As a “Master”, the Chef should take chances and envision the future. Even Rick Moonen, a Chef with overcompensating man parts cause he’s “the fish guy”, went out of his comfort zone and made venison. Venison people! Purely on his exploration of his future, out of his comfort zone, this should have gandered him more stars. 

The Fish Guy Chef Rick Moonen

Judge/Author Jay Rayner was swooned by Moonen’s oyster. In fact, hilariously homo Saveur Editor James Oseland asked Moonen to marry him. Give your future husband 5 stars will ya?!?!? 

Oseland said, "Will you marry me?"

SuSur Lee’s heartbreaking story of his first wife, no doubt, brought a tear to everyone in the audience. In SuSur’s first dish, Gail Simmons of Food and Wine Magazine gushes about the black bean sauce. 

Gail-Is that your nipple?

Oseland said they were transported to the Dim Sum Restaurant that SuSur and Father visited. Love it. From the heart. 

Dim Sum = From the heart

Susur’s third dish, according to Frontera Grill’s Chef Rick Bayless, Chiang Mai sausage on lamb “…pretty much nailed it” and “even better than the original Chiang Mai”. 

Top Chef Master Bayless said Susur, "Nailed it!"

Chef Samuelson should not have won. A bit younger, Chef Samuelson has been featured in TONS of food publications-but we feel the young lad needs a bit more time to braise before elevating him into the Top Chef “Masters” category. Besides, flan is so 2004 (Check the cover of America’s Test Kichen’s Cooks Illustrated, The New Best Recipe). 

Named Top Chef Master Marcus Samuelson

True his dishes were a reflection on his skills and his plight to introduce Ethopian food to the world should not outshine the efforts of his Sweedish background which wasn’t really apparent. Now if he tied more of the Sweedish into the Ethopian…now you got a show. 

A real Sweedish Chef

So envision in your mind about a “Master” …now Marcus Samuelson and Rick Bayless. Even at 4am, drunk with slurred speech, Chef Rick Bayless wins. 

The loveable Top Chef Master Rick Bayless

All three chefs worked hard and appeared to have produced dishes that they were generally happy with. 

Other random thoughts: 

1. Kelly Choi should not be so skinny if she is adjudicates a cooking competition. Eat something! 

Choi needs to eat...Put something in your mouth!

2. Apreciated that Bottega Chef Michael Chiarello kept his mouth shut. 

The Prick, Chef Frenchy, Chef Loves Everything

3. Wanted more mainstream reviewers to weigh in on the final judgement. Maybe Les Halles Chef Anthony Bourdain, The French Laundry Chef Thomas Keller, Lola/Lolita Iron Chef Michael Symon…I’d even take Food Network’s hotness Chef Giada DeLaurentiis (C’mon, play nice with the other networks). 

Giada in a moment of bliss...Mmmmm

Overall Top Chef Masters Season 2 wasn’t as exciting as Season 1…but we did appreciate more theatrics and f-bombs (Bayless, you’re just too nice). And if this is any indication of “Masters” seasons to come, I am sure a Chef, on the show, will get drunk…then naked…and then pregnant…typical Bravo TV. We can all thank those Real Housewives of Stupidtown shows. 

The Real Housewives of Skanksville, USA

So raise a glass to ratings…I mean good food! 

Reporting live from QuarryLaneFarms