It’s amazing to see the most simplest ingredients from a small beautiful place in the middle of the Pacific Ocean really do make the best foods.

The view from my lau lau prep station today

And it doesn’t get much more fresh than fresh picked ti leaves, luau leaves, stems, pork butt, salted fish, and pork fat…that right…cue the porn music cause we’re talking about lau lau!

Bern chicka bern bern……

So the family elders have finally decided that our generation could handle some of the prep work this year for the Hawaiian food. And what better way to “show us the ropes”, then to have us make all the lau lau. So with a quality control beers and bloody marys in hand and a watchful eye, our families watched as our staff made lau lau out the yin yang (hahahaha).

Step 1: Put on your personal protective equipment (cause the luau leaves tend to cause some irritation to your skin.

I didn't do it...

Step-2: wash and prepare all the luau leaves and ti leaves.

Step-3: In a 4-5 part lettuce wrap of luau leaves, place a few pieces of pork butt, salted fish, additional pork fat, extra luau leaves stems, and tie everything up tightly in two ti leaves. At this point, it should be a softball sized piece of goodness.


Step-4: Steam for 4-8 hours.

Nothing fancy...just steaming away

Step-5: Take out. Have QA review finished product (warning-this could induce panic as your guests salivate over said finished product.

QA check...Um, can I have the pat down sir?

Step-6: Take out the two ti leaves from the outside and place insides wrapped in cooked luau leaves on the plate for guests.

Softball of lau lau

Step-7: Enjoy the ono food. Duh.

I should tell you that you should have an adult beverage in your hand.

I should tell you to enjoy the Hawaii weather.

But surely into your first bite, you wouldn’t hear much of anything else as the most succulent piece of pork just flakes away amongst the melted pieces of pork fat. The flavors combined of pork and salted fish with the steamed luau leaves complete the lau lau as the quintessential Hawaiian food.

The perfect lau lau

Like Kei$ha’s ass after a drunken dance party, your taste buds succumb to the salty savory flavors that make lau lau so awesome.

Plate #1...

Since family is now calling for more beer (I think they just broke out sparkling sake), I shall return to the delicate ballet of rubbing my belly and loosening my belt while no one is looking. I now regrettably despise myself for not wearing elastic waistband pants.

Stop drooling, cause we’ll be adding this to our menu very soon.

Reporting live from the family Christmas luau here in beautiful Hawaii…