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W-T-Falafel is this?

Stopped by Whole Foods for a quick bite. Feeling a little subterranean Mediterranean  so I quickly grabbed this lunch box.

heh heh….I said box.

Falafel Wrap Lunch Box – $6.99

Falafel Wrap Lunch Box

Definitely heavy for its size. Upon opening said lunch box,  I found this mess.

The mess in my lunch box

Weird and goopy-this can’t be typical right?

The spinach was fairly crisp, but the tomatoes were a bit…well mushy, not good.

Additionally, whomever prepared this hates salt. Bland and tasteless…just like your mom.

I almost felt it was more like Ethiopian food where one would use the three finger poi method to sling it in your mouth. No fork needed.

Soggy Sally indeed!

Wrap was soggy. Not cool.

This was by far the worst lunch box I’d ever eaten.

Speaking of the worst lunch box…

The worst…um….

I just threw up in my mouth.

Hope your Tuesday was better than mine.

Reporting from QuarryLaneFarms…

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We’ve been traveling alot lately…so we figured we’d give the new UAL/CO flight food a try.

UAL/CO/WTH

BTW-We hope this merger of United Airlines and Continental Airlines goes smoothly cause right now, my relationship with them is rocky due to their logisitical nightmare illegitimate flight numbering system.

Flying high above the Rockies, the flight attendant asked if I wanted a mid-flight snack.

In my head: Is she talking about my first “Mile High Club” request?

Um, you want my schnack?

From my mouth: “You want me to eat your what??”

Luckily she laughed and asked me again about their inflight food service, adding she liked the Thai Chicken Wrap as it’s the newest and most flavorful of the snacks.

With a quick swipe of my debit card for $7.95 – I was the proud owner of this.

UAL/CO - Thai Chicken Wrap

Good idea from UAL/CO to keep the sauce separate otherwise all mush in a wrap is not good eats.

Sauce me...Wait, does that say 2.5g of Saturated Fat?

Split in two, the interior of this Thai Chicken Wrap was everything BUT chicken. As you can see, there is a slew of iceberg lettuce and carrots to please any rabbit.

Um, it says Chicken in the name...

Sauce on the wrap helped because without the sauce, it tasted like I was eating “my very own complimentary copy” of SkyMall.

SkyMall needs some sauce....bleh

As you can see, the “chicken” portion vs lettuce portion in this wrap was tiny.

Where's the Chicken!?!??!

Like my nuts on a cold wintry day, the amount of chicken was smaller than one chicken McNugget. Yep, less than one frickin chicken McNugget.

So lets review:

1. Creative food naming is the name of the game. Don’t be fooled.

2. Get sauced before flight so you just sleep.

3. If you HAVE to…Bring/Buy your own meal before you get on the plane.

Hope your mile high dreams come true…Mine didn’t.

Reporting live from QuarryLaneFarms…

We should have mentioned in yesterday’s post that no Kahlua was harmed in the making of our Kalua pig. 

Oink oink

Just to clarify, Hawaiian Kalua pig does not use Kahlua liqueur

Kalua pig // imu

 

QLF kalua pig ingredients: Pig (duh), Hawaiian red salt, beer, Keawe wood (or liquid smoke), red onions, garlic, and generous splash Bulliet Bourbon. 

What can you eat with Kalua pig? Anything! Traditionalists would say Lomi lomi salmon, poi, squid luau, etc…But sadly, Cleveland area stores/restaurants do not have said items on their menus. So as mainlanders, you can serve kalua pig in other ways. QLF has served sliders, plate lunches, etc…For this batch, we opted to make a wrap

QuarryLaneFarms Kalua pig wrap

 

Wish it was nice weather AND the weekend again. 

Reporting live from QuarryLaneFarms…

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